Brexit leads by 132% compared to next week.

Where ever you go, whether it’s the pub, the shop, the pub… where ever…. all you can hear people talking about is brexit. What the fuck is brexit? We sent our reporter into a white room to find out.

bill fat bloke

Bill Costly who owns a service station franchise told us he was voting brexit because he was a stupid cunt. When we asked him if he was joking he laughed and then pushed us away before suddenly turning angry and telling us both to fuck off whilst squeezing a big block of cheese.


Coko caught her husband fucking the dog. “He’s really anti-brexit so i thought how better to get back at the bastard than vote brexit”jim

We didn’t really want to talk to Jim in the white room but he kept coming over to us asking if we needed any soundbites. Every time we said no, but every time the relentless prick gave us one anyway.


Some people say if we leave europe china will nuke us and sell us loads of post nuke plastics to help stick our faces and bodies back together. Well they won’t, and anyone who believes that is a fucking dickhead. GMO plastic is real and we need to stop it now. Vote brexit or else you will all die.